What’s the point anymore… I’m lost at sea… no stability, no anchor…

I can’t imagine there’s anyone coming to help, to save me from myself, nothing can save me now.

I don’t know what made me think I could do this… did I even have a choice? Now it seems I have no choices left to choose between… There is no safe way left for me to go, no path left to take but to see this one through even if it leads to my destruction, to see my own demise…

What was the point? I don’t remember anymore… I’ve been here so long that I can’t even comprehend there was anywhere else but here. The dreams of anywhere else are fading, like waking up, disoriented, between here and there… but I’m not sleeping anymore…

I’m stuck in this nightmare of my own choosing, with no choices left.

Why am I doing this? Why do I go on? There are no reasons left in me… whatever point there was to any of this has been lost, lost at sea like me.